Chapter 1: Don't Sweat the Small Stuff
Chapter 1 Question: What is one example of “small stuff” that you let get to you recently?
One time “small stuff” got to me was the fact that we can’t be in person for the things we normally do for school. Since distance learning has been chosen for the teaching method for the year so far, I just feel like I am missing the in person connection I used to have before COVID-19. This to me is “small stuff,” as my family is not infected and staying distant is the safest and smartest thing to do right now. There could be so much worse happening to me right now from COVID-19 so I should just be thankful for my position right now and not worry about the one small thing that I don’t like.
Chapter 2: Make Peace with Imperfection
Chapter 2 Question: How does our ‘ego’ distract you? I.e. judgement, fear, anxiety, depression, comparison, hatred, anger, and more...
My ego distracts me with anxiety about the future. When I am preparing for a test, I start thinking if I don’t do well in this class I won’t get into a good college and won’t do well in life and so on. The constant anxiety and fear of a butterfly effect from one test to my whole life is something I need to constantly work on. In addition, being an AP student is a big part of that because of the tests and all of the hours you need to put into them to get a good grade. If I don’t spend my time studying and preparing, then my anxiety will come in and the process will start, freaking me out and worsening my anxiety even more.
Chapter 3: Let Go of the Idea that Gentle, Relaxed People Can't Be Super Achievers
Chapter 3 Question: Thoughts: “When you have what you want (inner peace), you are less distracted by your wants, needs, desires and concerns. It’s thus easier to concentrate, focus, achieve your goals, and to give back to others.
I believe this quote is about not worrying about things that don’t directly impact your life. When you are happy and not worrying about the “small stuff” you will be more productive and achieve more, and in turn, become a better person and will achieve great things. Being stuck on your wants, needs, desires and concerns will only leave you distracted and frustrated, which will spiral into much worse things, so you are better off finding or keeping your inner peace rather than worrying about other things.
Chapter 4: Be Aware of the Snowball Effect of Your Thinking
Chapter 4 Question: Do you notice how your body and mind feel when your thinking is out of control?
When my body and mind creates unrealistic thoughts and my thinking is out of control, I can notice that things are not going well and stop them. I have been known by my friends to never get angry and yell or be very mad over anything, and this is because I compartmentalize very well. When any angry thoughts or things that get me mad, I just think on how it really is from an objective view and the thought of it in my mind becomes a speaking bubble that slowly fades away. Using this, I hope to further help myself with the “small stuff” in my life that has made me frustrated that currently I can’t compartmentalize.
Chapter 5: Develop Your Compassion
When it comes to academics, I usually blow something small out of proposition when I do not like the result. An example of something that was completely blown out of proportion that was really no big of an idea was on one of my Spanish edpuzzles. I had been studying my vocabulary for a long time and I still got a 96%, and that one answer that I got wrong just tore through my mentality. I thought “How could I get something I worked so hard on not be a 100%?” Being a perfectionist has its disadvantages and advantages, and 1 point off on my other assignments with 100%s was literally no big deal at all. In the future, I really need to calm down on one point lost and think of the big picture, like my compartmentalization for other subjects or feelings.
Chapter 6: Remind Yourself that When You Die, Your "In Basket" Won't Be Empty
My ‘in basket’ is a google spreadsheet that is filled with different assignments, projects, and study times that is completely full all of the time. As Carlson stated, we should be living our life with peace and calmness, and an always full ‘in basket’ will never let us achieve that. Taking his advice, tomorrow I will make time for the things that make me calm and happy all of the time, which in my case is playing video games. This lets me let go of the current time and just enjoy life with friends, not worrying about what is to come or what studying I have to do. In addition, playing video games keeps my mind sharp. After playing my designated time, I am way more motivated to get things done and to do the best I can. You could compare completing my video game session with a bodybuilder’s cheat day. We both did the thing we love, but once it is done, we get back to business with even more effort and confidence.
Chapter 7: Don’t Interrupt Others or Finish Their Sentences
Chapter 7 Question: Do you believe you are a strong listener or could use some work ?
Personally I think I need some work in my listening skills. Earlier in my life, my listening skills were terrible, as being a child is like having ADHD so you try to finish their sentence for them, which is rude in hindsight. Currently the only problem I have is I assume they are done with their point so I start talking, which interrupts them and destroys the flow of the conversation. I had never thought of putting myself in their shoes in that type of situation so it is helpful that interruption is not something to do in a conversation. This chapter has enlightened me on something that is subconscious that we need to fix, and I will take this chapter’s central idea with me in life.
Chapter 8: Do Something Nice for Someone Else-and Don’t Tell Anyone About It
Chapter 8 Question: Recall a time that you have given, and did you expect acknowledgement?
A time that I have given was in math class for the concept of powers. The person that I was kind of tutoring did not know that a number to a negative power is the same as 1 over the positive version. After I taught him this, he was really appreciative of my effort and I felt good about my actions and it brightened my mood for the rest of the day. During this, I was not expecting acknowledgement, as helping out peers and friends is something basic that shouldn’t be something we can use for credit. Even though I sometimes do things for recognition, I should be doing them just to be a good person and this chapter really taught me to not be selfish and to give more without expecting anything.
Chapter 9: Let Others Have the Glory
Chapter 9 Question: Have you experienced someone else ‘stomping’ on your story(glory)? How did it make you feel?
Personally I have not had my glory stomped on in a long time, but the last time I can recall was in eighth grade during a slide show presentation. For this science presentation, I was set up with three other students and the other students did not put any effort into it and it resulted in me spending extra time doing their part of the project so I can get a good grade. When presentations come, the people are flabbergasted on what is on the slides because they have no idea to say, so I end up talking for them. They tried to pull the “which one is MY slide” which technically stomped on my glory but I responded with “Your slide was the one I had to do for you.” This act of narcissism from that student to try to make them seem like they know what they are doing to boast to their friends got shut down, but those seconds after I got stomped on did not feel great. It seemed like they were trying to one up me or take credit where there was none for them, and being a recipient of this taught me before this chapter to not intrude and take their glory from them.
Chapter 10: Learn to Live in the Present Moment
Chapter 10 Question: What are some ways that you work to stay in the present moment?
Some ways that I work to stay in the present moment is catching myself snowballing a negative thing or reflecting at the end of the day before going to sleep. First, catching myself snowballing a negative thing is something I only do when it comes to my future. I have talked about this in an earlier response, but when it comes to college, taxes, and money my brain goes out of control. For example, a bad grade will make me think of how I am not going to get into a college because of the bad grade turning into a bad overall grade and then how I’m not going to get my dream job then I will end up homeless. It sounds crazy but it happens to me too much. When I see this happening, I catch myself and just let it go because at the end of the day, one bad grade is not going to do much to your overall unless you fail a final. Another thing to stay in the present moment is when I am in bed about to fall asleep. I normally catch myself wandering into the past or future in the day so when I look back on it in bed I think of how I should just relax and live in the moment. Most of the time it works going into the next day but it wears off after a week or two so I have to keep reminding myself.
Chapter 11: Imagine that Everyone Is Enlightened Except You
Chapter 11 Question: Think of a time when you were frustrated, now look at it as a moment of being taught...what did you learn?
A time that I was frustrated but can look back on it as a lesson was when I was at the postal office applying for a passport. This was a little back, like 2 or 3 years, but I really do remember it vividly. We had an appointment for 5:00pm and arrived at 3:30 to make sure we get the slot in time. Hours go by and it is 6 almost 6:30 (7:00 is the closing time) and I am freaking out and really impatient on how we might not get it done in time. The person who ended up doing it for us at about 6:50 was named Crystal, and she was talking about how she wants to go home to see her kids. Thinking about it now I never thought about the feelings of the person behind the counter and their lives after work. I learned from this that you need to be patient and have compassion for people whose jobs are not the best in your opinion. You are blessed to be a teenager right now and have time to worry about what job you are going to have, so feel compassion for the people doing the menial jobs you don’t want.
Chapter 12: Let Others Be “Right” Most of the Time
Chapter 12 Question: Challenge: the next time you are in a discussion/argument, let the other person be right and take notice on the initial feeling that transpires.
An example of a scenario that I have encountered that ended up where I told the other person they were right was a couple months ago with one of my friends. In the conversation, we somehow ended up talking about politics (The worst subject for opposing sides) and I decided midway through to not get it heated. Even though I had so many rebuttal arguments, I knew he was just going to ignore me and keep going with his points, which was very frustrating. I ended up telling him that we can just keep our opinions, and think that we are both right in our own perspective, and just move on, which we ended up doing. After that, I felt both frustrated at his actions but also accomplished that I ended something that I knew wasn’t going to go well.
Chapter 13: Become More Patient
Chapter 13 Question: Do you ever have a reflective moment when you realize you are so very small in this vast world and really your ‘drama’ isn’t that big of a deal?
Oftentimes I always have a reflective time when I am going to bed on my past actions and decisions in the day or even week. Small things that I consider like embarrassment or drama I really just let go at the end of the day, which I have found to be very effective at growing and not staying in the past. On the contrary, I do like to keep negative thoughts in my mind for when I am doing things that push me to the limit, like working out. I always keep those thoughts because they fuel my workout and make me perform better, even at the cost of keeping them. After the workout, I do release those thoughts, as being positive around people I know really affects the vibe and emotions of them. Drama itself isn’t a big deal, but combined with other things, it can arise as a huge problem. The veil of importance covers most of our lives and busies us through the day, and even though it is small behind that curtain, we never look past it and focus on what’s in front of us.
Chapter 14: Create “Patience Practice Periods”
Chapter 14 Question: Do you have a ‘Mantra’, a statement, that you make to yourself daily or weekly?
I actually do have a statement, although weird to others, that I carry myself with everyday. My statement is “You are self defined and your actions speak to who you actually are.” I’ve noticed that carrying this statement with me has really helped me get through my plateaus in life that I failed to get through, whether mental or physical. These words in fact have more meaning to me, but I don’t want to disclose them and they really do mean something special to me. Having these words as motivation really helps me get through my day and improve at the things I don’t excel at.
Chapter 15: Be the First One to Act Loving or Reach Out
Chapter 15 Question: Have you lost a relationship because something “small” created a “big” divide?
Although I haven’t lost a relationship because of something small, I have seen many relationships dissolve because of it. It is crazy to think that menial things can make someone so stubborn to forgive, so I think it is important to have a good mentality when it comes to dealing with situations like that. I have seen someone lose a friendship of 6 years because they had one big argument and neither side would admit to being wrong which I find shocking, because someone should cherish a relationship and an argument shouldn’t be the reason for losing a person you love. I try as best as I can to forgive when I can because losing someone is so much worse than being stubborn, and losing relationships because you blew the menial thing out of proportion is not acceptable.
Chapter 16: Ask Yourself the Question, “Will This Matter a Year from Now?
Chapter 16 Question: What do you hope to do a year from now?
In a year from now, I hope I can be someone far from who I am and at the same time be as close as I can as I am now. I really like how I am acting, from my sleep schedule, productivity, and dedication, to how I handle negative emotions. But at the same time I need to work on so many more things I can’t even count. Confidence, self image, and loving myself are some of the things that I really need to work on, so in a year I don’t expect them to be fixed but rather a little bit better. Progress doesn’t happen overnight, and I understand that, so I try to as much as I can to fix those problems. Living a content life while being happy is what I can only dream of now, but as long as I put in the work today it will pay off.
Chapter 17: Surrender to the Fact that Life Isn’t Fair
Chapter 17 Question: Is life meant to be fair? What does that even mean?
Life, in my opinion, is never meant to be fair or will never be fair unless society progresses to an unimaginable point. Society makes so many standards for people that it makes it impossible for everyone to be happy. Beautiful in this world for women is being fair skinned, skinny, perfect teeth, and this makes absolutely no sense. How is everyone supposed to be that if we are all our own person? How do you expect every man to be masculine, over 6 foot, super strong, have facial hair, when we all come in different shapes and sizes? How do you expect people to climb the economic ladder when you are born into poverty in a situation with all of the odds going against you? Life will never be fair, and some people blame that on capitalism, but in truth it is society itself that is the problem. Communism still makes indifference among people and makes standards, (as history states) so what is the root of the problem? Us. Gen Z have made a huge effort to reverse societal norms and so far it has started to work, but it all starts with us and the next generations. For life to be fair, people need to have the same opportunities, and it is impossible for this to happen today, which saddens myself and many others.
Chapter 18: Allow Yourself to be Bored
Chapter 18 Question: Do you take time to be bored?
Most of the time in the day, I don’t take time to be bored or stressed because I think of it as a waste of time. Now, I have done 5 minutes of meditation when I am really stressed out (Ex: Finals) but besides that, I don’t really take time to be calm and peaceful for a little while. After reading the chapter, I decided to try 5 minutes of pure silence just closing my eyes. It was very relaxing, but I would rather do it with meditation music just to push it a bit further. Just letting your stress melt away for those 5 minutes really does have an impact on your day, and I really recommend it.
Chapter 19: Lower Your Tolerance for Stress
Chapter 19 Questions: Have you been taught to believe high stress is a positive thing?
Although I have been taught that your mental health is very valuable and relaxing is a very good habit to be doing every now and then, I still believe that high stress is a positive thing in some circumstances, and the way I grew up basically facilitated that idea into my mind. Since both of my parents were very poor while growing up and have very complicated jobs, the concept of stress tolerance has gone up so high for them. With my dad, he has gone through so much school work (10+ years outside of high school) that his stress levels have gone through the roof. Since I admire him, I feel as if I need to be doing something to get to my dream, if I am not stressed then I will go nowhere. The same concept applies to my mom, and overall, stress and hard work will always go hand in hand with me and until I reach my dream job, no amount of stress will get in my way.
Chapter 20: Once a Week, Write a Heartfelt Letter
Chapter 20 Question: When is the last time you sat down and wrote a letter to someone with gratitude?
The last time I sat down and wrote a letter to someone was earlier this year for a video. When I did this, I wrote to one of my friends and read it to him over the phone. When I did this, it felt really great and it really helped me express my feelings and emotions, which I have a really hard time doing. Gratitude is something that doesn’t come to me easily compared to others (Kylee) because personally, I lack empathy and compassion. Sometimes I make almost too logical reasons to not care, but still showing it is very important. Since I have grown up with this mindset, I have really not developed my emotions and emotional skills. This experience was very insightful and helpful in changing me for the better, and I would not hesitate to do it again.
Chapter 1 Question: What is one example of “small stuff” that you let get to you recently?
One time “small stuff” got to me was the fact that we can’t be in person for the things we normally do for school. Since distance learning has been chosen for the teaching method for the year so far, I just feel like I am missing the in person connection I used to have before COVID-19. This to me is “small stuff,” as my family is not infected and staying distant is the safest and smartest thing to do right now. There could be so much worse happening to me right now from COVID-19 so I should just be thankful for my position right now and not worry about the one small thing that I don’t like.
Chapter 2: Make Peace with Imperfection
Chapter 2 Question: How does our ‘ego’ distract you? I.e. judgement, fear, anxiety, depression, comparison, hatred, anger, and more...
My ego distracts me with anxiety about the future. When I am preparing for a test, I start thinking if I don’t do well in this class I won’t get into a good college and won’t do well in life and so on. The constant anxiety and fear of a butterfly effect from one test to my whole life is something I need to constantly work on. In addition, being an AP student is a big part of that because of the tests and all of the hours you need to put into them to get a good grade. If I don’t spend my time studying and preparing, then my anxiety will come in and the process will start, freaking me out and worsening my anxiety even more.
Chapter 3: Let Go of the Idea that Gentle, Relaxed People Can't Be Super Achievers
Chapter 3 Question: Thoughts: “When you have what you want (inner peace), you are less distracted by your wants, needs, desires and concerns. It’s thus easier to concentrate, focus, achieve your goals, and to give back to others.
I believe this quote is about not worrying about things that don’t directly impact your life. When you are happy and not worrying about the “small stuff” you will be more productive and achieve more, and in turn, become a better person and will achieve great things. Being stuck on your wants, needs, desires and concerns will only leave you distracted and frustrated, which will spiral into much worse things, so you are better off finding or keeping your inner peace rather than worrying about other things.
Chapter 4: Be Aware of the Snowball Effect of Your Thinking
Chapter 4 Question: Do you notice how your body and mind feel when your thinking is out of control?
When my body and mind creates unrealistic thoughts and my thinking is out of control, I can notice that things are not going well and stop them. I have been known by my friends to never get angry and yell or be very mad over anything, and this is because I compartmentalize very well. When any angry thoughts or things that get me mad, I just think on how it really is from an objective view and the thought of it in my mind becomes a speaking bubble that slowly fades away. Using this, I hope to further help myself with the “small stuff” in my life that has made me frustrated that currently I can’t compartmentalize.
Chapter 5: Develop Your Compassion
When it comes to academics, I usually blow something small out of proposition when I do not like the result. An example of something that was completely blown out of proportion that was really no big of an idea was on one of my Spanish edpuzzles. I had been studying my vocabulary for a long time and I still got a 96%, and that one answer that I got wrong just tore through my mentality. I thought “How could I get something I worked so hard on not be a 100%?” Being a perfectionist has its disadvantages and advantages, and 1 point off on my other assignments with 100%s was literally no big deal at all. In the future, I really need to calm down on one point lost and think of the big picture, like my compartmentalization for other subjects or feelings.
Chapter 6: Remind Yourself that When You Die, Your "In Basket" Won't Be Empty
My ‘in basket’ is a google spreadsheet that is filled with different assignments, projects, and study times that is completely full all of the time. As Carlson stated, we should be living our life with peace and calmness, and an always full ‘in basket’ will never let us achieve that. Taking his advice, tomorrow I will make time for the things that make me calm and happy all of the time, which in my case is playing video games. This lets me let go of the current time and just enjoy life with friends, not worrying about what is to come or what studying I have to do. In addition, playing video games keeps my mind sharp. After playing my designated time, I am way more motivated to get things done and to do the best I can. You could compare completing my video game session with a bodybuilder’s cheat day. We both did the thing we love, but once it is done, we get back to business with even more effort and confidence.
Chapter 7: Don’t Interrupt Others or Finish Their Sentences
Chapter 7 Question: Do you believe you are a strong listener or could use some work ?
Personally I think I need some work in my listening skills. Earlier in my life, my listening skills were terrible, as being a child is like having ADHD so you try to finish their sentence for them, which is rude in hindsight. Currently the only problem I have is I assume they are done with their point so I start talking, which interrupts them and destroys the flow of the conversation. I had never thought of putting myself in their shoes in that type of situation so it is helpful that interruption is not something to do in a conversation. This chapter has enlightened me on something that is subconscious that we need to fix, and I will take this chapter’s central idea with me in life.
Chapter 8: Do Something Nice for Someone Else-and Don’t Tell Anyone About It
Chapter 8 Question: Recall a time that you have given, and did you expect acknowledgement?
A time that I have given was in math class for the concept of powers. The person that I was kind of tutoring did not know that a number to a negative power is the same as 1 over the positive version. After I taught him this, he was really appreciative of my effort and I felt good about my actions and it brightened my mood for the rest of the day. During this, I was not expecting acknowledgement, as helping out peers and friends is something basic that shouldn’t be something we can use for credit. Even though I sometimes do things for recognition, I should be doing them just to be a good person and this chapter really taught me to not be selfish and to give more without expecting anything.
Chapter 9: Let Others Have the Glory
Chapter 9 Question: Have you experienced someone else ‘stomping’ on your story(glory)? How did it make you feel?
Personally I have not had my glory stomped on in a long time, but the last time I can recall was in eighth grade during a slide show presentation. For this science presentation, I was set up with three other students and the other students did not put any effort into it and it resulted in me spending extra time doing their part of the project so I can get a good grade. When presentations come, the people are flabbergasted on what is on the slides because they have no idea to say, so I end up talking for them. They tried to pull the “which one is MY slide” which technically stomped on my glory but I responded with “Your slide was the one I had to do for you.” This act of narcissism from that student to try to make them seem like they know what they are doing to boast to their friends got shut down, but those seconds after I got stomped on did not feel great. It seemed like they were trying to one up me or take credit where there was none for them, and being a recipient of this taught me before this chapter to not intrude and take their glory from them.
Chapter 10: Learn to Live in the Present Moment
Chapter 10 Question: What are some ways that you work to stay in the present moment?
Some ways that I work to stay in the present moment is catching myself snowballing a negative thing or reflecting at the end of the day before going to sleep. First, catching myself snowballing a negative thing is something I only do when it comes to my future. I have talked about this in an earlier response, but when it comes to college, taxes, and money my brain goes out of control. For example, a bad grade will make me think of how I am not going to get into a college because of the bad grade turning into a bad overall grade and then how I’m not going to get my dream job then I will end up homeless. It sounds crazy but it happens to me too much. When I see this happening, I catch myself and just let it go because at the end of the day, one bad grade is not going to do much to your overall unless you fail a final. Another thing to stay in the present moment is when I am in bed about to fall asleep. I normally catch myself wandering into the past or future in the day so when I look back on it in bed I think of how I should just relax and live in the moment. Most of the time it works going into the next day but it wears off after a week or two so I have to keep reminding myself.
Chapter 11: Imagine that Everyone Is Enlightened Except You
Chapter 11 Question: Think of a time when you were frustrated, now look at it as a moment of being taught...what did you learn?
A time that I was frustrated but can look back on it as a lesson was when I was at the postal office applying for a passport. This was a little back, like 2 or 3 years, but I really do remember it vividly. We had an appointment for 5:00pm and arrived at 3:30 to make sure we get the slot in time. Hours go by and it is 6 almost 6:30 (7:00 is the closing time) and I am freaking out and really impatient on how we might not get it done in time. The person who ended up doing it for us at about 6:50 was named Crystal, and she was talking about how she wants to go home to see her kids. Thinking about it now I never thought about the feelings of the person behind the counter and their lives after work. I learned from this that you need to be patient and have compassion for people whose jobs are not the best in your opinion. You are blessed to be a teenager right now and have time to worry about what job you are going to have, so feel compassion for the people doing the menial jobs you don’t want.
Chapter 12: Let Others Be “Right” Most of the Time
Chapter 12 Question: Challenge: the next time you are in a discussion/argument, let the other person be right and take notice on the initial feeling that transpires.
An example of a scenario that I have encountered that ended up where I told the other person they were right was a couple months ago with one of my friends. In the conversation, we somehow ended up talking about politics (The worst subject for opposing sides) and I decided midway through to not get it heated. Even though I had so many rebuttal arguments, I knew he was just going to ignore me and keep going with his points, which was very frustrating. I ended up telling him that we can just keep our opinions, and think that we are both right in our own perspective, and just move on, which we ended up doing. After that, I felt both frustrated at his actions but also accomplished that I ended something that I knew wasn’t going to go well.
Chapter 13: Become More Patient
Chapter 13 Question: Do you ever have a reflective moment when you realize you are so very small in this vast world and really your ‘drama’ isn’t that big of a deal?
Oftentimes I always have a reflective time when I am going to bed on my past actions and decisions in the day or even week. Small things that I consider like embarrassment or drama I really just let go at the end of the day, which I have found to be very effective at growing and not staying in the past. On the contrary, I do like to keep negative thoughts in my mind for when I am doing things that push me to the limit, like working out. I always keep those thoughts because they fuel my workout and make me perform better, even at the cost of keeping them. After the workout, I do release those thoughts, as being positive around people I know really affects the vibe and emotions of them. Drama itself isn’t a big deal, but combined with other things, it can arise as a huge problem. The veil of importance covers most of our lives and busies us through the day, and even though it is small behind that curtain, we never look past it and focus on what’s in front of us.
Chapter 14: Create “Patience Practice Periods”
Chapter 14 Question: Do you have a ‘Mantra’, a statement, that you make to yourself daily or weekly?
I actually do have a statement, although weird to others, that I carry myself with everyday. My statement is “You are self defined and your actions speak to who you actually are.” I’ve noticed that carrying this statement with me has really helped me get through my plateaus in life that I failed to get through, whether mental or physical. These words in fact have more meaning to me, but I don’t want to disclose them and they really do mean something special to me. Having these words as motivation really helps me get through my day and improve at the things I don’t excel at.
Chapter 15: Be the First One to Act Loving or Reach Out
Chapter 15 Question: Have you lost a relationship because something “small” created a “big” divide?
Although I haven’t lost a relationship because of something small, I have seen many relationships dissolve because of it. It is crazy to think that menial things can make someone so stubborn to forgive, so I think it is important to have a good mentality when it comes to dealing with situations like that. I have seen someone lose a friendship of 6 years because they had one big argument and neither side would admit to being wrong which I find shocking, because someone should cherish a relationship and an argument shouldn’t be the reason for losing a person you love. I try as best as I can to forgive when I can because losing someone is so much worse than being stubborn, and losing relationships because you blew the menial thing out of proportion is not acceptable.
Chapter 16: Ask Yourself the Question, “Will This Matter a Year from Now?
Chapter 16 Question: What do you hope to do a year from now?
In a year from now, I hope I can be someone far from who I am and at the same time be as close as I can as I am now. I really like how I am acting, from my sleep schedule, productivity, and dedication, to how I handle negative emotions. But at the same time I need to work on so many more things I can’t even count. Confidence, self image, and loving myself are some of the things that I really need to work on, so in a year I don’t expect them to be fixed but rather a little bit better. Progress doesn’t happen overnight, and I understand that, so I try to as much as I can to fix those problems. Living a content life while being happy is what I can only dream of now, but as long as I put in the work today it will pay off.
Chapter 17: Surrender to the Fact that Life Isn’t Fair
Chapter 17 Question: Is life meant to be fair? What does that even mean?
Life, in my opinion, is never meant to be fair or will never be fair unless society progresses to an unimaginable point. Society makes so many standards for people that it makes it impossible for everyone to be happy. Beautiful in this world for women is being fair skinned, skinny, perfect teeth, and this makes absolutely no sense. How is everyone supposed to be that if we are all our own person? How do you expect every man to be masculine, over 6 foot, super strong, have facial hair, when we all come in different shapes and sizes? How do you expect people to climb the economic ladder when you are born into poverty in a situation with all of the odds going against you? Life will never be fair, and some people blame that on capitalism, but in truth it is society itself that is the problem. Communism still makes indifference among people and makes standards, (as history states) so what is the root of the problem? Us. Gen Z have made a huge effort to reverse societal norms and so far it has started to work, but it all starts with us and the next generations. For life to be fair, people need to have the same opportunities, and it is impossible for this to happen today, which saddens myself and many others.
Chapter 18: Allow Yourself to be Bored
Chapter 18 Question: Do you take time to be bored?
Most of the time in the day, I don’t take time to be bored or stressed because I think of it as a waste of time. Now, I have done 5 minutes of meditation when I am really stressed out (Ex: Finals) but besides that, I don’t really take time to be calm and peaceful for a little while. After reading the chapter, I decided to try 5 minutes of pure silence just closing my eyes. It was very relaxing, but I would rather do it with meditation music just to push it a bit further. Just letting your stress melt away for those 5 minutes really does have an impact on your day, and I really recommend it.
Chapter 19: Lower Your Tolerance for Stress
Chapter 19 Questions: Have you been taught to believe high stress is a positive thing?
Although I have been taught that your mental health is very valuable and relaxing is a very good habit to be doing every now and then, I still believe that high stress is a positive thing in some circumstances, and the way I grew up basically facilitated that idea into my mind. Since both of my parents were very poor while growing up and have very complicated jobs, the concept of stress tolerance has gone up so high for them. With my dad, he has gone through so much school work (10+ years outside of high school) that his stress levels have gone through the roof. Since I admire him, I feel as if I need to be doing something to get to my dream, if I am not stressed then I will go nowhere. The same concept applies to my mom, and overall, stress and hard work will always go hand in hand with me and until I reach my dream job, no amount of stress will get in my way.
Chapter 20: Once a Week, Write a Heartfelt Letter
Chapter 20 Question: When is the last time you sat down and wrote a letter to someone with gratitude?
The last time I sat down and wrote a letter to someone was earlier this year for a video. When I did this, I wrote to one of my friends and read it to him over the phone. When I did this, it felt really great and it really helped me express my feelings and emotions, which I have a really hard time doing. Gratitude is something that doesn’t come to me easily compared to others (Kylee) because personally, I lack empathy and compassion. Sometimes I make almost too logical reasons to not care, but still showing it is very important. Since I have grown up with this mindset, I have really not developed my emotions and emotional skills. This experience was very insightful and helpful in changing me for the better, and I would not hesitate to do it again.